You Do Not Owe Anyone Your Culture

Finals Predictions And Injuries

I ain't interested. I don't know. Other things is interesting out here. Like the Spurs in New York. Yeah, that's gonna be interesting. That's the Spurs and five. I say four. And the only reason why I say four, just the way the universe works. Like, yeah, New York was sweeping all the motherfuckers just to get swept at the finals. Yo, new New York City as a whole will be sick if that happens. But the universe works like that sometimes. I don't think Cat is a match for 1B. And the Spurs got some dogs, and they got some young dogs. So it's just like, yo. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, you know what I mean? And I think Mitchell Robinson hurt. Is he hurt? I know he was suspended. He suspended? Who's hurt? OG uh OG's hurt or OG hurt. Mitchell got suspended. He was in a full fight in the middle of a game. How many games he suspended for? The first two? Or just the first game of the next series? Um that's where I was. Oh, he does have work on the figure. Yeah. Cause he got in that who did he get in that fight with. I don't remember. I don't remember who. When it started looking like uh they was gonna sweep um oh he he didn't get the he avoid his expenses. He had a fifty fifty thousand dollar fine for fighting with the dude from the hawks in game six. Yeah. Mitchell Robertson ain't playing. I'm about to say the Hawks have been they played the Hawks in the first round, didn't they? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I thought he was in the playoff. I mean, either way, the Hawks got beat that game anyway. Yeah. Yeah.

Pacers Grievances And Ref Talk

Hi everybody, welcome back to another episode of the according West Podcast. As always, got D Lawyer. You gotta lose, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's me. Somebody stayed up watching the game. I mean, you know, sometimes you just gotta watch your enemies lose. Uh OKC was your enemies? Yeah, man. OKC and the Lakers my enemies. I hate both of them. I mean, because they beat the Pacers both and they get the finals. Yeah. The Lakers won. I mean, hey, I get it. They were just a better team than us. You know, I couldn't even, I couldn't even say, oh, well, you know, the Rams and this stuff. Kobe and Shaq were they were just they just put that work in. I get it. Yeah. The OKC one. We we should have game game four. We should have won that to go up 3-1. We should have won that. But I think we were up by like 12 or something, 12 or 13, going into like the third. Yeah. All of a sudden, the Whistles for the Pacers disappeared, and all of a sudden. The roughs came to play. Yeah. The Roughs checked themselves in. Scott, I think it's like Scott Foster, the referee, they call him the extender because that's what he does. He extends the series. Yeah. And so they started, you know, the the OKC started playing more physical and weren't getting weren't getting caught for no fouls. Even announcers were kind of like, you know, they just called this Tic Tac foul down here, but you didn't call that that heavy push off right there or that hard foul right there. You know, no offensive fouls on SGA when he was pushing off. Like you get a whole hand of a person right here, you throw them off of you. Almost fall because you done. No travel, no foul, but you call a defense a foul on the person who we pushed. I think it makes sense. So I wish we we could have got this sort of uh justice last year where the Patriots would have won the finals. We wouldn't have been without Tyrese Halliburton. We wouldn't have been in game seven. Honestly, we win game four, we go 3-1. We end up going back to OKC. Um we end up going back to OKC, losing game five, and we go back to Indiana, win game six, close it out four-two, like we did everyone else that in that playoff series. Uh close them out game six, raising that championship up in Indiana. And possibly I'm not gonna say we would. Possibly be looking at a repeat. Now, do I think it would have happened? We haven't had any repeats since um uh Golden State. It's been like a couple years, like this is this would have going back and forth. Yeah. But um I I think we would have I'm not gonna say we would have repeated. I'm not gonna say we would have made it to the finals. Like, I think we still would have started off just as slow as we did last year. And we would have picked it up, but I think New York would still be in the finals. I think it was it would it'll still come down to Pacers, New York Conference Championship, and they and New York might have squeaked it out because they they just hunger this year. Yeah, I don't think they felt they should have lost last year, but you know, when you got the opportunity to win, gotta take it. So

Spurs Knicks Matchups And Wimby Leap

that's how I look at it, and we might still be looking at a Spurs Knicks finals, yeah. New York is uh New York, the Knicks are playing good team ball and everybody balling, yeah, and that's what you want, and the Spurs is playing good team ball and everybody balling, yeah. So I and now it just comes up to matchup, yeah. That's a tough matchup today. Yeah, hell yeah, man. They matchups, they match up evenly. You back you they match up even across the board, even with Wimby and Kat. It's it's still not a complete, like they don't match up evenly. Uh point guard-wise, it's like, yo, do you keep De'Aaron Fox on uh do you give him more time? Because I think he's coming off an injury too. You give him more time against Brunson. You know what I mean? But Castle might be the better defender, but Jalen is fast, might be faster than Castle. They're going to put Castle Oil. I mean, regardless of whether or not Fox is in there or not, they're gonna put Castle Orion. Could you imagine? Because we got I'm pretty sure you got some uh some native uh New Yorkers uh that you are familiar with like uh in your personal life and stuff like that, or just the way they are. Could you imagine if they win this fucking championship and you gotta interact with them? Could you fucking imagine that? It's gonna be a lot of sucking my dick from the back, bitch. Like, it's gonna be a lot of that. It's gonna be a lot of that. Yo, that's that's that that's gonna be like the equivalent of like, you know how Trump got into office, and white men just seem to be like so uh, they won't be out there now. They they assertive and they they chest is out and shit. I'm like, I ain't ready for that shit, man. I am not ready for that shit. But what I am ready for to see how they if they're gonna tear apart that city just in the in then celebration. Like, how the fuck is that gonna go? Are y'all gonna party all summer? That's what I wanna see. That's what the fuck I want to see. But hey, we got an interesting series coming up. They're not playing tomorrow, are they? They they're waiting a week or something like that. It's Thursday. Thursday. Yeah, yeah, we got an interesting uh interesting finals. It was uh I wonder what Cam gonna do, man. You a Spurs, he a Spurs, uh he a fan of the Spurs, but the Knicks is in there too. So like what you gonna do? Are you gonna be uh like what you gonna do? No, Cam, he might come in with a like the next it is what it is. He might come in with uh some type of uh uh Spurs Knicks hybrid jersey, and it might say kill on the back. Never know. You never know. Cause he said he's a Spurs fan now, so we'll see. We shall see. Well, we're about to find out uh who's gonna be our next champion. If Wimby wins this, because he this is his third year, right? I think so, yeah. You know, I'm not gonna say Wimby could have won in his first two years, cause he his first year no. First year I didn't see him coming out of uh the West because let's face it, he was soft. He was soft, like he was soft, he was so year two. When they finally started pulling a little bit of aggression out of him, yeah, you started really seeing like you you could be something. You you could be something. Then this year was the first time that you saw him kind of be like, wait, I can just dunk all over these niggas and they can't stop me. No, they can't, and and now he dunking all over they can't stop him. Yo, I wonder this is a hot take. So Chris Ball was on the Thunder and he was on the Spurs. Is it of is it far fetched to say that and they were all but they was both, they have both had a team of young dudes. Is it is it c is it is it far fetched to say that he might be the ultimate OG? Because Sha developed his mid-range game during the Chris Paul shit. That that whole thing. Yeah. I I talked to my my boy and and and and and and Wimby knows how to look for the ball. That's a big man. I told my boy this yesterday when I talked to him without Shay getting Chris Paul because Shay Shay started out in LA. LA, you know, he was out there in LA with uh, if I'm not mistaken, he was out there in LA with Chris Paul with the Clippers or Red All developed this song. Shea wasn't originally a Thunder. He wasn't originally a Thunder player, I'm not mistaken. Yeah, with the Clippers. I don't know who was on that Clippers team, and I don't know if that was around the time of the um the Chris Paul tree. I don't know if he I don't know if he was part of it as far as like a draft pick or something that went to get him. But nonetheless, Chris, you know he got to he got to um he got to the Clippers, he did one year there. No one knows who the hell this dude is because honestly he wrong in no time. He wasn't that good. Yeah we were talking about AB Brisbane. Because I think it was Russell Westbrook and uh Paul George still on that team at the time. Right, am I wrong? Because he was there 2018-2019, Russell Westbrook that was they were on or am I am I that's a good question because that 2018-2019 that was when the Spurs is that when the Spurs won the no, that's when the Raptors beat Golden State for the NBA championship. I wonder who was on that Spurs team in 2004, 2018, 2019. That's what we were saying. But no less let's see on draft night, she was traded to the Lakers in exchange for Miles Bridges. That's from that was from uh Charlotte. So he was trying to try Charlotte and got traded if they just swapped Miles Bridges for SGA and then they made the playoffs. They don't say who was on 18, I'll tell you that. Scored his best, blah blah rising stars, NBA playoffs, first block, first round loss in six to the to the Warriors, and then got traded to the Clippers for Galinary and five first round draft picks. Right, I think the Clippers might have been in rebuilding then. Yeah, I mean, because his rookie year he played 82 games, 26 minutes a game. He averaged 10 points, one steal, two rebounds, three assists. Yeah, rebuilding. Yeah, so then when he then when he got to OKC, started averaging 19. Chris Paul, better point guard. Like what was their point guard when the you know, not the point guard, uh uh power uh yeah, point guard, point guard. Because Chris Paul wasn't in OK, wasn't in LA with them. It was Patrick Beverly, which makes sense why he wasn't playing that good. Yeah. Oh yeah. And he might have been the backup point guard now that I'm thinking about it. Well, I know Patrick Beverly was starting then, and then SJ as the backup. Yeah. Yeah, Wilson Channel. They had a good team. I'm not saying Patrick Beverly is a bad point guard, but Patrick Beverly isn't Chris Paul. Yeah, exactly. He's he's a very he's a he can control the game with his passing, but he even when I want to say his best years of even scoring was like, I think when he played when he played in LA, I think he averaged like 12 points, but really he he was really just out there being disruptive and you know playing defense. That's what he did.

Renaissance Barbecue Vs Cultural Event

The internet once again needs D los help. And someone wants to know are they wrong? Are are they wrong for choosing to go to a friend's Renaissance barbecue over an African-American theme event like my fiance once? Now, they say my fiance's blackness matters a lot to her. She is very cultural like that. I, on the other hand, I am quite literally the polar opposite of her, but we somehow make it work, and we've been together for five years now. Did he just say that I'm white, she's black? They're both black. How do you tell? I know. So my let me finish. So my buddy invited me over to his place. We are to dress up as people from the Middle Ages with jousting archery with those foam arrows, and maybe some sword swinging and fighting. He may, but we may scrap that one. Uh, I don't know. Sounds like a sex day. I asked my fiance if she wanted to go, and she said it wasn't her thing. Well, today she told me of an event that she really wanted to go to, and she really and she wanted me to she wanted to know if I wanted to come. When she told me to date, I told her I couldn't go because I already agreed to go to my buddy's thing. She was quiet for a bit, and then she expressed her frustration with me for not wanting to explore for me for I'm sorry, my frustration with me for not wanting to explore my blackness and do something that will enrich myself culturally. That's how you do it. I told her that this was her thing, and while I respect that, it literally has no, I it literally has no interest at all for me. And if I did go, it would only be for her, and I'll probably zone out, which I do as well. But not with situations like that. So, really, she really didn't like that last line, and now I'm in a hole with her. What should I do?

Anniversary Cruise And Money Reality

And yeah, he should just be glad that we already know why I started laughing. He should be glad he's not married yet. And she didn't like say, Hey, I'm uh for my anniversary, we're gonna I'm gonna go do this, and you can go do this. That guy said to you, no, oh no, no, my wife would she just be like, Oh, I plan a group, I plan something. Oh, when are you going? And she'd be like, uh, here's the dates. And I have to look at her, like, are you serious? Sorry, I've virgin. Yeah, I mean, you can go if you want to, you just gotta put your money up, or we could do something that's not expensive, yeah. You know what I'm saying? It's like they don't never know what it's like, money don't exist sometimes. I told her because she was like, Oh, well, you know, I was thinking about being done it, we would have problems. And she was like, What do you mean we would have problems? Because if our anniversary is that Friday, what makes you think that if we went out and got some dinner and then came home that I would have other things planned for us to do? And that all of a sudden I go to go tutor and come home, and you're like, Oh, I'm on a cruise that we wouldn't have problems. Like, come on, come on. You you you well, it's not that sick to you, it's not to you, you like, well, it shouldn't be that well, let me so she already planned a cruise. We're gonna get back to this person's situation, but she already planned a cruise, or she's planning a cruise on the day anniversary, and was like, you can go too, just you just got paid for your ad. Something like that. She was like, Oh, well, we can she wanted to go to the cruise, and she was like, Well, I think we should go on the cruise. All right, at least it was just in the planning phase. Okay, in the planning phase. It wasn't like I think she had already like started putting a down payment, and then she like kind of told me I was like, That is not the planning phase, that is the execution phase. Oh well, I missed the planning phase. Yeah, she planned it. I was like, so what what date are you looking at? She's like, Oh, on these dates here. So, you know, that's our anniversary weekend. Oh, well, yeah. Well, our anniversary is on Friday. I know it's on Friday, it's our anniversary weekend. So, what you were just gonna let's say I didn't actually lost. She sh she was she initially going to include you. I don't think so. Um I think so happened. I I don't know what happened, but we were on a Google Meet. We were at work, we were on a Google Meet, and she was like, So I want to tell you something. Blah blah. Um think we should go on this cruise. I kind of put my down payment down, and like um okay. Like I didn't think. Like, all right, you think we should go? Yeah, okay. You're you're hearing the details. You're like, all right, yeah, sounds cool, I guess. And then she hits you with the it's on this date. I was like, I mean, I really don't have no money to go. I'm like, I'm thinking it might say if it was anything. Yeah, well, I get what you're saying. Like, yo, you wanted to go. I ain't got the funds right now to be with the, but you already plan in this shit, and you feel like you can do it on your own, go do it. And then you hear the dates, and you're like, oh, oh, ho ho. No. No. I get that. I get that. Yeah, if you would have done that shit, like, yo, so uh, yeah, I'm thinking about going to Vegas to catch blah blah blah blah blah. And she like, you know, I don't really like boxing or this. I mean, I'm sure she does, but you get what I mean. Like, I don't really live on the blah blah blah blah blah. And then you tell her to date, she'll have a whole heart attack on you. So you just go with your friends. Don't let it be. Oh, yeah, uh, it's gonna be Mother's Day weekend. Mother's Day weekend. So you you just gonna go plan something on Mother's Day weekend or oh, but it's not Mother's Day. On Mother's Day, I got you. Yeah, on Mother's Day and I'm gone. Yeah. You're good. It's just certain things guys could never do. I mean, you could, but it won't be looked at the same, you know what I mean? The uh they'll be the the the villain on the internet when it comes to stuff like that. Oh yeah. Oh, it always is but I was like, all right, well, sure. I mean, I'll use a credit card and run up more debt and yeah. And she was happy with that? She's like, okay, sure. Sure, all right. Nah. Well, sorry, that's y'all. If you any other date, we'd have been good. Oh, I'm gonna go with November. Okay, well, have fun. Yeah, see you when you get back. Ain't no need to argue with you about it. We gotta be a little bit better than that. Yeah. Man, I be so uh so much on uh my Ps and Q's. I try to do I try not to do nothing a little before or after because I don't know what the fuck be going on, what the mindset is gonna be. You know what I mean? Like once I kind of get a feel of like how we gonna handle that, then you know that's what it's gonna be. I never know what either. You said what? I never know either. I just at first I was like, all right, well, you know, here's what it is. Now I'm just like I just tell them like a good idea, or this is what it's gonna be, and blah blah. At this point, I done I done stopped back for it, just this is what it is. Oh well, what's for dinner? Well, I don't know what is for dinner. Well, I mean, you know, I cooked yesterday. Yeah, well, and you telework today. So I still want that. This is still a thing with y'all to telework thing. I thought I said every Wednesday that I telework, your food's been ready. Whether I cooked the night before, that whole week didn't matter. I just had it ready. Right. Well, it's Friday, and we gotta eat. Um, you know what that means. Friday means no one cooks at the house. Hey, look, we both been hungry if I get no food. Shit. What are we gonna eat today? I don't know. I don't know. Well, I mean, I can eat me a bag of beans. Okay. So what am I gonna eat? Well, I don't know. You've been here all day. What you mean? Oh my gosh, what y'all doing? Hey man, you know, it's a new experience, man. Every year it's gonna be something different. No, it shouldn't be. Not with that, at least. You know what I mean? Like even when I telework, I try to make sure I at least got shit started. Like, even if she won't, you know, pick up, you know, fin pick up where I left off or vice versa. But I know what the fu I need to eat, so it's just like yo, I'm not gonna not eat all that shit. I mean at this point, I'm just like, whatever. Well, yeah, I don't know. Let it be Wednesday that's work. So what we eat. I don't know, what you wanna eat? You gotta go get it though. She looked at me like, you been home all day. What the fuck is wrong with you? Yeah. I said, oh well, you know I was working hard. I literally saw you walk out the house four times, come in with stuff. I chatted you, called you, you didn't answer the phone, you weren't didn't say it was any weeks in the calendar. What the hell were you doing all that? I was like, whatever. You ain't gonna lie to me. You're working on that. Walking, you in the bed taking a bag for your advice. Well, there's a couple here. They're both black. They're both from Canada, actually. Yes, I've been there. Yes, they are. There's a lot of Jamaicans and Nigerians there, Ethiopians there, there's a lot of it's a lot of us there. Different uh different uh folks from the the continent of Africa. So yeah, yeah, yeah. That is true. It's alright. That is true. The crazy thing is, uh take away the the

Compromise Without Guilt Or Control

take away the black shit, because I am black, but take away that. All this really is is that she wants you to do something that you don't want to do, and vice versa. Yeah, pretty much. And what's okay with saying, like, I understand when sometimes women be wanting your woman be wanting you to do something, and it ain't up your alley, but they be mad that you doing it just for them. I why else would I be doing it if I'm not interested in it? That's true. I'm showing that I care because, like, yo, you want me there, I'll be there, and then gonna be mad when I'm like, I don't understand what's going on, or I'm zoning out. I am trying, I don't give a fuck. And I ain't never like if I went to like a sport sports event or something like that, my girls there or whatever have you. I ain't never be like, Yeah, fucking see that touchdown. Like, I'm not, you know what I mean? Like, it's like yo, she's happy to be there. I just know what the things he only asked her, get her some cotton candy, you know, keep the food. He only asked her if she wanted to go to like a what was it, costume party? Like a renaissance fair. Renaissance for barbecue or something like that. Yeah, barbecue. So I mean, I get it, but she she wanted to go to like an African American thing. I mean, yo, you're not you're not, you're not, you're not indulging into your blackness. She told him he he not acting American. She told him he don't know how to play spades. That's basically what that's what she said. Yeah, is you don't know how to play spades, nigga. Where's your and then I'm trying to get you to learn how to play spades, but every single time something like this comes up, you want to go play Super Smash Brothers. You don't want to sit at the table and play spades with everybody, you want to go in the room. So I don't know, man. I mean, she she pretty much said, nigga, you're not black enough if you don't want to go to this thing with me. That's pretty much what she said. Nah, she trying to guilt that man. At the end of the day, y'all don't have to do everything together. This is not uh this is the it's not even a cultural thing at this point. Y'all don't have to do everything together, right? However, if you told your woman, like, hey, we will be uh on this journey together to uh learn more about our culture and stuff like that, and this is an opportunity, recognize that this is an opportunity. But if you ain't say that, then yo, she should kind of just chill out a little bit. Like, yo, y'all y'all gonna have like that's the thing with couples. Y'all have a lot of things in common. Y'all don't have everything in common, and that's what makes y'all y'all. I'm not gonna expect my my significant other to, you know, do and want to do and enjoy everything that I like doing, and vice versa. So she should get out of her feelings a little bit. Well, I mean, the other part of it is is they're not married. Either way, she should still get out of her feelings a little bit. Like, even if it was married, get out your feelings. I mean, because the the way the the way that this could all go down, and it can go good or bad. It could be, well, look, I'm gonna go to this barbecue, you go to the thing, and we'll meet back up at the crib if we live together. Yeah, and it could go back to where she's like, she might go to the thing, he might go to the barbecue, and then it might be a whole discussion about how she really wanted him to go to this thing, and that if that's not what she's gonna do, what he's gonna do to go with things with her, then maybe they shouldn't get married. It's gonna turn it, it could it could go completely left. I'm gonna tell you like that. I welcome that left shit. If this is some basic shit of I didn't go with you to this one thing, then you're brat. He's not even tripping off of her not wanting to go. See how you see how one party is just chill, like eh, you don't want to go to my thing, that's fine. Another party is like, yo, so you don't want to go to my thing? And it's just like, no, the fuck? Like, like I said, take the the the thing away. It's take the African-American theme event away. It's still an event he don't want to fucking go to. Right. Yeah. Well it boils down to. I mean, you're gonna you're gonna end up not wanting to go to a bunch of stuff. It's like, all right, well, I want you to come with me to this thing for my friend, and he's like, I don't even like the bitch. I mean, that's what I'm saying. Like, that's how that's what I'm saying. Like, being married, like, I think I handle my shit like that the best way. It's like there's some things I know my wife is interested in, and I'll go and be uh attentive. But she asks me to go to those things all the fucking time. Just like I don't ask her to go to those things all the time. And usually when one party does that for each other, it's you know, the most common thing we do is go get something to eat that we like. So sometimes it's just thugging that out just to be like, all right, where's that place with the good pasta at? You know what I mean? Yeah, that's that's pretty much what it is. They making this, they're making this harder than what it needs to be. Yeah, definitely are, especially for them to be, I'm not gonna say moved into the relationship. No, they've been that they've been together for five years. Yeah, but I'm just saying, like, to be about to get married, and this this it's like, all right, it is what it is, yeah. I don't want to go to your African American thing, and I don't give me into it by saying I ain't black enough, I can't play spades, I ain't got no uh she ain't we we threw that in there. We ain't say she said that she all she said was uh let me throw my sauce on let me throw my sauce on. I was just trying to do the the whole story justice. Well, yeah, sauce it up. She said you don't play spades, you don't drink Hennessy, they're Canadian, you don't drink great soda, you don't put extra sauce on your fried chicken. I strike all of that from the record. They're all they're Canadian, they're Canadian. You ain't been on M OK Boulevard, Canadian, they're Canadian. I mean, I'm just saying in the grand scheme of it. That's what that's in my head. That's what she said said to him. Nigga, you ain't black enough. But at the same time, you're right, right, right. Because she just she pretty much just she she pretty much just pushed a teeth him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's that's funny. Yeah, she pretty much did. Well, also, and Kendrick doesn't think that's that's besides the point. Actually, it is it is the it is because a teeth because he said because your hair wouldn't nap. You think you never thought you were black enough because your hair wouldn't nap enough. That's why I said, Yeah, geez, yeah. She's frustrated that he's not trying to explore his blackness, and it's just one of those things where it's like, yo, I mean, explore my blackness. When racism happens, I I explored, you know, the microaggressions and shit. It's been explored. Hey, look, it's been explored. I don't feel the need to explore my blackness because I have to live it every day. Yeah, exactly. That's how a lot of us feel. We'll know the history, but I know my history from what I can uh what I can uh dig up and gather, it stops at a certain point. Like, do I know my not my my possible Nigerian cousins or or you know uh great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great, great. No, I don't. I can I can see the concern if I was out here supporting white. Yeah, but he not I get the concern if every time I you you say something, I'd be like, Well, the white man said this and a white man said that, and you know, whitey got the right answer. I can guess the thing, and that would never happen because that's an American thing, and they're in Canada. You kind of get what I'm saying? Look, look, I done placed them in Compton, California already, man. Look. I done placed them in I'd have placed them in the hood somewhere because they blasted. But I I get it, you know, because I mean there's it's not like it's not racism in Canada. There's there's a lot of racism in Canada, as friendly as they say they are, there's racism out there. But if he don't feel like he need to deal and see his black African roots for the for the same reason that most of us don't care to know about him either, because when you talk to the Africans or anything about it, they look at you like you ain't one of us, and you look at them and you be like, nigga, we all are all from Africa. Even these white mothers, they from Africa too. So you gotta it's one of those things. I'd rather if I'm him, I'd rather explore my own roots. Now, if those lead me to Africa, so be it. Right. But to explore a bunch of roots of people who I don't know, who I won't ever know, who you know might have did some great stuff, or even in this case, wherever she wanted to go, was looking at some of the black things around as far as some of the things they made from the curse, like all right, that's cool and all, but where the food? They got some jollo rice up here, you know, they got some Spanish stew. Like, where's the where's the foo foo at? You know what I'm saying? Like make me want to come to the motherland, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, don't let her trick you, man. Don't let don't let her trick you. Because women have this this honey. She's trying to at the end of the day, she she's trying to change him. Some of them she he's not trying to enrich himself culturally. It's just like, yo, it is what it is. It's been five years. Yeah. She's trying to she trying. She she try she tried to get her trick back of well, I don't want to go to this function. And I'm not gonna say that. She didn't even be the part. He don't even care about that part. He's just saying, Well, my mom, my whole thing, you said you ain't want to go because he asked her first. She said, Nah. She actually came back and asked him about the event she wants. He's like, Yo, that's normal my thing with my buddy. I said I'd be over there. How the fuck are you gonna get mad at me when I asked you first and told you that's what I'm doing? I'm supposed to cancel what I'm doing to go to your shit. It's like I said, it's screaming brat. It's like, yo, and you trying to change me. It's like, nah. Even though you're in that whole with her right now, it is what it is. Talk your way out that bitch. Tell her what's fair is fair. It's like, yo, if it means that much to you, I I uh, you know, hit me on something, you know, we could do something else together. But I already agreed to this. Or boom, boom, boom, or to play a different role of it, you know, not my regular role. What time is it? And just go. Well, think about it. No, she need to learn a lesson. I don't want no, I'm not no. Think about it, think about it. So if I'm supposed to be going to watch, right now I'm watching Clash in Italy, WWE, right? So let's say this event was on a Saturday at like eight o'clock, and she's like, Well, why don't you go to this thing? And I know I'm supposed to be going to my man's house, or let's let's make it even better. Let's say there's a whole fight: Tank and Shakira Sanders, some of the big names are all fighting that night, and the thing starts at like six o'clock. If she's like, I want what was this name? Well, what time is it? Well, it's uh it starts at four. Okay. Well, is there anything else you want to do after this thing? Because now you can be like, I can still make both. Who really wants watch on the car? You you you know what fights you want to see. You know, and in this case, you know what matches you want to see. Like right now, it's Cody Rhodes versus Guther. And they really shouldn't be leading off this thing, but our tribal chief Roman Reigns with with our ones up, hold on to the camera. He's fighting the night, so you know he's always gotta be the main event. You know what I mean? And uh I say you're like, you know what? I don't even want to see the uh the earlier matches, so you can make the shit work and all you catch on your phones, but you still won't go to the other event because your people are gonna be there. You're gonna get some free food, some free drinks, you're gonna be able to socialize, whatever. There's a way to do it all. Now, if they're at the same time, you're gonna have to make a choice. And the choice is is do I do what I want to do and make that stand on this, which comes with his own set of consequences of oh, okay, cool. He wants to do his own thing, that she starts going out to all these other random things, and you be like, You weren't gonna tell me, oh well, I didn't think you were mine because last you 10 years down the road. Well, you didn't want to go last time because you want to go hang out with your friends. I never said I was hang out with my friends, you never said that. Oh, I didn't think you would want to go. Yeah, like you end up there. Oh shit, it looked like Cody might lose. What is Cody gonna lose? Oh my god. But um then it can also go the other way that he compromises and goes with her and and skips on the other thing or goes to the other thing late. And now he's stuck in that cycle with her. That it's see that that that particular cycle is not a bad cycle. It's just one of those, it's it's just one of those, it's just one of those things where it's just like uh it appears from what this guy says and what I'm reading. I mean, it's not a bad cycle. The the issue with that cycle, the only issue with that cycle is is that when they don't want to go somewhere, it's not any for for any real reason that they'll tell you. Or you know, it's oh like you know, I always invite my wife to go to trip. She doesn't want to go. My whole thing is what's wrong with saying I'm not interested. My wife says shit like that all the time. Like, I don't I'm not gonna be interested. She's like, Well, I'm not interested in trivia because you hang out with the wife. Okay, that's cool. Hey, look, yeah, she's honest. She honest. At least she's honest. I I can live with that. Yeah. If I'm like, hey, I'm about to go to Stu's and you know, and for his birthday, and this is this, oh, I want to go because you know, last time we were there, this, this, and this happened, and I kind of got bad vibe from people that were there. So I ain't really if those same people will be out and wanna go, school, hey, it is what it is. I go in with it. Yeah. The stuff that bothers me, it'd be like, oh well, well, you know, it's uh this particular holiday you want to go. Oh no, I just want to stay home because I didn't have my thing to go. Okay, cool. But you can go. Why would I go without you? Yeah, like my thing, my thing with my wife sometimes.

Why Family Events Judge Absences

Is if I don't want to go, if she doesn't want to go, I say, okay, I'm not going either. Well, I'll go without you. I said, Well, the way I look at it, it's always culturally acceptable for a husband not to go to stuff. Yeah, that is one of the is one of the things, it's one of the things we get. We give much. We get that. But we get that one. Yes, yes, we do, yes, we do. It's an unwritten, it's an unwritten, it's an unwritten rule. We definitely get that. And I cash that shit in all the time. Yeah, like the husband always, hey, I don't want to go. Like my dad was the same way. Like my mom, we would go to like family events, and they already knew my dad wasn't coming. They already knew he wasn't coming. Yeah. But it's it's almost like one of those black family things where it's like the woman represents the family. Yes. As opposed to certain things. So when she's like, Well, you can go hang out with your family and do this. I don't want to go. And I'm like, okay, well, I'm not going without you. She well, why not? I said, Because I don't feel like answering. Why is she here? Like, like it's my fault. I don't feel like answering all those questions. Uh well, why is your wife not here? Why is this? Why is that? Why is this? Why is that? Because then it turns into are y'all good? Right. Are y'all this? Are y'all and I'm like, and sometimes like you don't understand what what I'm saying. Why aren't you why is she? Oh, well, she didn't want to come. Why didn't she want to come? She don't like us. Right. You know now I get now. It's oh well, you know, she wasn't feeling good. Well, is she all right? Well, why are you here? She's not feeling it. You should be all right. And you like, man, see, this is that bullshit. Like, this that bullshit. So they'll never ask from with the encounters that I've had. I've never heard no one ask a wife. Oh, your husband not here? Oh no. He had he he didn't feel like coming. Oh, okay. Well, we we get it. Yeah. We get it. One day I'm gonna I'm gonna explore that more because it's just kind of like I don't be thinking nothing of it. And nobody else be thinking nothing of it. But as soon as the wife is not there, and again, and I guess because that's coming from the woman folk too, like because they want to sit and talk and this, this, and that, and the guys are usually like they'll turn on the you know how that shit is if the game is on, everybody sit on the sofa watching the game. Or if the if the grill, if there's the grill is going on, everybody around the grill, like you need a bear, yeah. You know, y'all just saying, you know, talking about regular shit, but barely talking. Yeah, but but you know, the I think the other thing is is that when for women's especially at the at your events when you don't go when you go without your wife, you say, Well, she didn't want to come. I think the women take it a whole lot more personal than if the oh they'd be overthinking this shit. And it's like, yo, uh, she just didn't want to get out of bed, man. Like, what you what you what you want me to do? Like, I gotta um my cousin married this this white guy, but yeah. I mean, you know, just to put it in perspective, he'd be like, Oh, well, you know, I don't, you know, sometimes I'm gonna be wanting to go to the events, and so she'll show up to the events, her and her daughter, and it'll be like, Oh, where's where's where's Matt? Oh, uh, oh, he didn't want to come. Oh, okay. Hey, I get it. That's how we all feel. We're like, hey, I get it. Yeah, that's why we when when when your husband don't show up to something, everybody's kind of like, oh, all right. Oh, I get it. The men be like, oh, I get it. It is what it is. It ain't no big thing, we ain't overthinking it. We're like, all right, well, each time I say what's up, and you go about your you go about the day. You ain't you ain't even worried about it. So never mind. That's the I think that's the that's the that's the worst part about it, especially if you like in the in the relationship. He gets deep in it. Yeah, well hey. But like I said, there's there's two ways this can do it. Like, you know, men and women are always gonna be different. Yeah, not even that. We're different, and then we're gonna be we're gonna like different things. Yeah. You're right. He could he could definitely show the both. If he if he if it's if it's possible, if it's feasible. If it's feasible, right? But it's that would that would be my personal recommendation for it. My all also my recommendation is it's five years now. If you feel like him not exploring his quote unquote blackness is gonna affect something, then sure you need to make a decision. Make a decision today. Because he already said uh he's quite literally the polar opposite, and you know, he knows he's black, but he ain't really doing deep dives and you know, doing stuff like you are, and that's if that's gonna bother you, then hey, because I might need to make a decision. So, my thing, especially with that, I'm doing this deep dive into my blackness. How does that change what's happened in the past? But not only that, how does what does that change between you and his relationship? Y'all both black, right? That's number that's that's number one. Number two, uh both black. Like what you do isn't something that he has to do. I don't think that's too far fetched, yeah, at least in my opinion, as far as being in a relationship. No, but but you're right. Like it's if I don't go to this event, how how unblack am I if other black people ain't going to it? Yeah, I'm